Captain's Log, Day 17

So didn't wanna get up, but had to – WT was coming & had work, which went well. Had 6 kids (besides WT) – not at the same time.

Yesterday – and today – JP made me breakfast. So I had a biscuit in addition to my apple fritter. Either this evening – or tomorrow, one – I've got to go to the grocery store. **Remember: add some fruit for my breakfast routine.

2 servings mac-n-cheese w/extra cheese. (By now, Coke 0 is a given. If it's regular, I'll note that.)

Did open house at school today. Basically, it's “meet your teacher” kinda thing. Plus get info on school, register for bus, eat ice cream (WT's favorite part.) I get home (I had to put WT into time out – 5 min – b/c he was giving me attitude. Afterwords, I explained that he needs to know that saying “sorry” and trying to make it better doesn't always apply; that he needs to accept the consequences of his actions; and that I love him. We were cool after that), and Mom (after talking about WT) starts talking about me and how “sick” (not her words) I am. She says that she's scared of me. Says that JP's probably scared of me. When I'm “normal,” she says that I'm so sweet, but the next day she's glad Daddy's home. She was telling this to Aunt Robbie as well. I just want to be left alone – don't talk about me to anyone unless it's a doctor or SSA. I opened up the information packet and saw my name's not on the information paper (it's a blue census form.) MAJOR OUCH!! Starting to tank. *Insert a few minutes* Talked to JP about the blue paper, and he said it was a census confirmation. Meaning, he answered the census questionnaire truthfully. He also said that the other information – emergency contact, transportation – wasn't on there. Also asked JP if he was scared of me, like Momma said, ever. He said not “of me” but “for me.” He said that, yeah, I had a tendency to bully. But he was scared to tell me stuff (like the blue sheet thing) for fear that I'd start spiraling out of control. Talking about this actually made me fee a little bit better. He said that from now on, whenever we hold hands after a major discussion, we pray. I told him that he prays alone for now. He said that if all I said was “Amen” he'd be fine. During the prayer, he said something about me being stable., and I started smiling b/c of something I saw on the net: “Stable: a place where horses live.”

BBQ chicken (½, well ¼, grilled), slaw, baked beans, deviled eggs (only 2: Momma got a bit salt happy...which is saying a lot coming from me!), lemon pie.

I need to try to go to bed early tonight so I'll be up and ready to take WT to school tomorrow. *sniff* My baby's growing up! *sniff* (2200)

**lights out at 2245.

(Originally written 8/15/13)