Saturday, September 28, 2013

Captain's Log, Day 31

I woke up once around 0300 and then again at 0518. It took me a few minutes to go back to sleep each time, so I didn't feel very rested.

Today I went to work. I had 3 total children – one was a baby! :) *sigh* I may get my baby fix.....nah. After work I met my Avon lady at Arby's so I could get Nanny's ring that had been exchanged.

I met JP at McDonald's in Franklin Springs. (He's camping at the drama field.) Today was our first counseling session. It went well...until the unfaithfulness part was brought up. That's when I started crying. I'd teared up a couple of times before then – especially when it came to talking about Daddy. Now I've 2 questions/statements rolling around in my head: (1) am I worth it? (2) this is my fault. I really don't want to process the whole affair. I really, really don't. I just wanna go on – talk about everything else. Too much guilt/pain.



(Originally written 08/29/13)

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